3 Benefits of Being Single

Single Person with CokeNo little girl grows up dreaming of going to bed every night alone, living by herself in an apartment. No little boy grows up dreaming of always washing his own clothes and cooking his own food. Regardless of whatever else we dream about, most of our childhood dreams include getting married and building a family.

Sooner or later that dream is often somewhat spoiled, broken, or misdirected. Parental divorce, domestic violence, addiction, or our own experiences of broken love may cloud the rosy dream of marital bliss. But for most of us even if that dream is buried, it’s still alive.

Then when marriage doesn’t happen it’s easy to become discouraged. Or perhaps marriage ended and you’re single again. You question, is there something wrong with ME? Where have all the good girls (or guys) gone? Am I doomed to be alone forever? Why doesn’t God answer my prayer for a mate?

I was single for 48 years. Then God brought a wonderful man into my life, and we are very happily married. But I know what it’s like to live year after year alone, wondering why it never happened for me. And I know what it’s like to finally completely give up on ever getting married.

Living alone for all those years, I did learn some very important things about the single life.

Continue reading...

Pain at Christmas, Part 2

Teenager with an AttitudeThe topic of painful holidays, with Pain at Christmas, really touched a nerve with our readers/listeners! Therefore, here comes Part 2.

I wish you could see some of our reader’s responses. A number of them did not want to comment publically, and I can understand. Some of their personal messages express such heartache!

Here are some of the situations mentioned:

Continue reading...

Pain at Christmas

MangerChristmas is a time for joy. It’s the wonder in a child’s eyes, the family you don’t get to see any other time of year, and the celebration of the best Birthday of all!

But for some, Christmas is anything but joyful. A friend of mine lost his mother this past February, and he’s dreading this first Christmas without her. Add to that the fact that his father is very ill and may not be alive when Christmas does come this year. Christmas just won’t be the same for him.

Another friend of mine was looking forward to spending Christmas with her first grandchild for the first time. Sadly her grandson was stillborn, so instead of joy at baby’s first Christmas there are empty hearts and an empty crib.

Continue reading...

A Response to Recent Election Results

BallotAlong with millions of others I was watching the election returns on TV Tuesday night. The last two days have provided somewhat of an emotional roller-coaster for me, and I know I’m not alone. A large group of people were surprised by the election results, and are now struggling to find ways to both understand what happened and to choose how to move forward.

Some possible responses to these events are decidedly unhelpful: becoming angry, running away and hiding, remaining depressed. And moving to some South Pacific island probably won’t work for most of us!

The pundits and TV talking heads have poured over the detailed numbers and there seems to be somewhat of a consensus: the country is changing.

Continue reading...
Hot Flashes, Power Surges, Grey Hair – and Wisdom

Hot Flashes, Power Surges, Grey Hair – and Wisdom

Grey Haired WomanI’m getting old!

That’s a very subjective statement. I don’t feel old. And I do subscribe to the adage “You’re only as old as you feel.” So I guess I’m not really old. But passing middle age still feels uncomfortable.

But more than half a century has passed since I first came on the scene. It’s almost certain there are fewer pages left to write than have already been written, at least as far as simple years is concerned. Rather than scheduling vaccinations or PTA meetings, I’m now getting to enjoy grandchildren – and then send them home. Seniority has its benefits!

As a gynecologist I speak with many middle-aged women about very personal things. Passing through the menopause transition is sometimes very emotionally challenging. Although freedom from the risks of pregnancy is usually a welcome change, issues of body image, desirability, mental and physical health, and multiple life pressures are difficult for many of them to manage.

Continue reading...