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Business man

5 Reasons I’m Proud of My Husband

When the person who knows you best also thinks highly of you, it fills your heart like little else can.
If you are not used to praising your spouse, it may seem difficult to find honest reasons to praise him or her. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t there!
I do my best to remind my husband how proud I truly am of him. Here’s what I tell him:

Couple in love

The Impact of Sex Outside the Bedroom

We get into trouble so easily over sex. For many it is the ultimate slippery slope.
The misuse of sex is a common denominator in a whole host of problems. Sex touches something very deep within us. There is probably no other area that so strongly impacts our sense of identity and value as sexuality does.

People talking

5 Thoughts Before You Speak Harshly

Words can hurt! It takes real emotional and spiritual maturity to pause before speaking, and to consistently use our words for good and not for ill.
Thoughts affect words. The thoughts you think when your spouse frustrates you can dramatically affect what comes out of your mouth. Here are some questions to think about in that moment before speaking harshly.

Space between you

The Space Between You and Your Spouse

When your relationship began you probably felt you couldn’t get close enough.
Then life happens. Things change. Something comes between you and your spouse. You start to wonder what ever drew you together in the first place. How did this happen?
Al (my husband) and I have made a commitment to keep the ground between us clean.

Hands of trust

The Fragility of Trust

Trust takes a long time to build. And it can be lost in a moment.
Sitting in the airport not long ago, I couldn’t help overhearing one side of a phone conversation.
We were witnessing a young man in real torment.

5 Steps to Staying Present

There’s more than one way to leave. And we do it all the time.
Whether it’s a job, parenting, church, or marriage, being present is a first step to anything good. You’ve got to show up! And that means showing up with more than your physical body.
Here are five steps to challenge that leaving, and stay present.

The Intimacy of Vulnerability

There are few things that bring two people closer together than vulnerability. Being physically, emotionally, or spiritually vulnerable with someone is a powerful force welding two hearts together.
Where two people of good will are in a relationship together, being vulnerable is one of the most intimate things they can do.
What does vulnerability look like in a relationship? Here are some ideas:

Intimacy is about YOU TWO, Not Performance

By the time they come to see me most couples are frustrated, disappointed, anxious, and tired. And tired of always having to perform in the bedroom.
And of course that’s not what sex is about. Or at least shouldn’t be about.

Happy Anniversary! Five Steps to a Happy Marriage

First a disclaimer: I’m not sure there are ANY five steps that guarantee happiness in any area of life, let alone something as long-term and complicated as marriage. But I DO know that there are some things that can make or break the union of two people.
Four years ago today (as I write this) I married Al Tanksley, and I’m more in love now than on the day I said, “I do!”
Here are a few things I believe have made a critical difference in our marriage,

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