Getting Your Spouse To Change

Upset CoupleMarriage is risky! When a starry-eyed young woman and a totally smitten young man decide to say “I DO,” perhaps there should be some huge yellow CAUTION light that starts blinking, and a warning siren that begins blaring. Expectations that everything will be rosy are almost certain to be dashed. Is the risk worth it?

One big source of trouble comes when one of them thinks, “Once we get married, I’ll be able to get him or her to change. He’ll stop drinking and watching pornography. She’ll learn to be a better cook. He’ll come around to wanting children. She’ll learn to get along with my mother.” Those expectations may not happen. Then what?

Expecting or demanding change from your spouse is likely to result in profound disappointment. People can and do change. But your role in someone else’s change, especially your spouse’s, is a different matter entirely.

Think for a moment about how God deals with us. He requires a lot of us. In fact He requires everything! He demands our perfection in body, mind, and soul. It’s a high standard.

But that requirement is step 2. It comes after step 1.

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Taking Charge of Your Health and Your Healthcare

Man filling out healthcare formsIt’s the best of times, and the worst of times to be healthy.

On the upside, for the most part we’re living longer than ever before. Medical and scientific discoveries have made it possible to enjoy an unprecedented level of high-tech and even personalized treatment for almost any medical condition. Medical information is available to anyone easily on the internet. We know much about the lifestyle factors that lead to health and longevity.

But on the downside, even though we’re living longer, we’re not living healthier. Chronic diseases and disability continue to increase. How healthcare is delivered is undergoing a great deal of controversy, and change. The large volume of medical information available is of uneven quality. And healthy lifestyle behaviors are in some ways even more challenging in our modern world.

With all of this, it’s easy for many people to just throw up their hands and leave both their health and their healthcare up to anyone – their doctor, the government, or some nebulous wish and hope.

But it shouldn’t be that way. Remember this: Nobody has a greater stake in your health than YOU do!

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When Arms Are Empty: Infertility

When Arms Are Empty: Infertility

Many couples do not have an opportunity to experience the joy of parenting, and do not have a baby to hold in their arms. Over ten percent of couples are unable to achieve a pregnancy within one year of trying. That’s over 7 million couples in this country. And that leads to the sometimes rocky journey of infertility and its treatment.

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Searching For The Fountain Of Youth

Fountain of YouthEven before Ponce de Leon spent his years searching Florida for the illusive fountain of youth, men and women have searched for ways to look and feel younger, and to keep from getting old. Promises of a return of vital strength, of younger looking brighter skin, or of reversing the aging process are almost guaranteed to sell nutritional supplements, beauty products, or health services.

Some would say our media-saturated culture glorifies youth at the expense of maturity. But might not those media messages be the result a deep-seated value system that we all share? We grasp at the raw strength, physical beauty, mental agility, and passion of youth. Most of us recognize that with maturity often comes wisdom, but we long for the freshness of youth.

Something in our soul understands that getting old, weak, and dependent is not our original destiny. Deep inside we sense that 70, 80, or even 90 years is not long enough.

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Women and Hormones: No Excuse!

Women and Hormones: No Excuse!

Women are wonderful creatures. Some say a woman is God’s crowning creation. A woman is beautiful, complicated, fascinating, strong, and loving.

But for some men, a woman presents a case of, “Can’t live with her: can’t live without her!”

Much of a woman’s fascinating, complicated nature comes down to her and her hormones. The very thing that makes a woman who she is can also create frustration, misery, and major conflict in intimate relationships. The seasons of a woman’s life are, in large measure, dictated by her hormones. Her monthly cycle, PMS, pregnancy, infertility, and menopause – they are all marked by significant hormonal changes, and the sometimes difficult emotional and physical results.

A woman’s nature is a finely-crafted integration of body, mind, and soul. Anything that impacts one aspect of her life has significant impact on every other area. Men are integrated beings too, but they are more compartmentalized than women. You cannot change one thing in a woman’s life without changing everything. Physical changes, often triggered by hormonal fluctuations, affect her emotions. The quality of her important relationships affects her physical well-being. And her spiritual life is affected as well.

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