I love board meetings. Really. I do! Because that’s how we communicate better.

But these are not your normal board meetings. I’m talking about the almost-nightly talks my husband Al and I have when we go to bed.

Here are the key parameters to consider in your communication:

1. Choose the time and place.
2. Own your own feelings.
3. Take time to listen.
4. Schedule talk time.
5. Put away distractions.
6. Be a safe listener.

And if you need some ideas of what to talk about, here are a few of the questions you can ask each other. These 7 questions can be great conversation starters:

1. Who are you? Share something about yourself, than ask your spouse to do the same.
2. What do you find difficult? Talk about what’s hard for you.
3. What are you afraid of? Everyone is afraid of something.
4. What do you dream about? Sharing a dream helps you know each other better.
5. What do you remember? Memories help you know where you’ve come from together.
6. What would you like to change? What does the future look like? What are you going to do about it?
7. What do you see God doing? God has a plan for you. What do you think that is?

When are YOU going to have your next Board Meeting?

Talk about these questions with your spouse:

• How would you rate the quality of the communication between us?
• What are the things you wish we could talk about, but don’t?
• How good of a listener am I? 

Here are some Action Steps to help you get started:

• Write down the elements of a communication time that would appeal to your spouse: time, place, setting, etc. It might be very simple, but be specific.
• Write down three things you would like to share with your spouse. Start with an “I” statement, such as: “I am afraid about …” “I would like to …”
• Schedule a communication time with your spouse some time during this week.

I’d appreciate your comments in response to these questions, or any other communication challenges you and your spouse are facing. Just leave your comments below.

Your Turn: What is the next topic you want to discuss with your spouse? When are you going to talk about it? Leave a comment below.

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