What’s under the surface in your heart will continue to define you until and unless you deal with it. All the little addictions you use as Band-Aids to cover up the junk only work for so long. When you’re sick enough of the dysfunction and ready to deal with your stuff, how do you do that?
The problem isn’t always the real problem. Taking Tylenol when you have a fever doesn’t cure the infection. Mowing the grass doesn’t take out the weeds. It was the under-the-surface part of the iceberg that sank the Titanic. You need a cure, not a Band-Aid. Whatever metaphor you choose, problems won’t get better unless you get to the stuff underneath the surface.
Marriage as God intended it to be is about learning to love well. We don’t learn that automatically. What you learned before you knew you were learning it – about life, yourself, relationships, marriage, God – notably impacts your relationships today. You can’t leave your past behind until and unless you deal with it. What you don’t know about marriage really CAN hurt you.