Perhaps Rosetta Stone, the language learning/translation software, should develop a program to help you learn what your spouse is really saying. Listening to some husbands and wives try to communicate, you would think they grew up in different countries speaking completely different languages. You need some translation aids for Man-Speak and Woman-Speak.
The problem comes when his English isn’t her English (or Spanish or Swahili or anything else). In truth, even if they did grow up in the same city men and women function very differently when it comes to language and communication. Add to that the different perspectives on life and marriage each grew up in, and it often adds up to learning a whole new language when you get married.
My husband Al would frequently make a summary statement about a practical problem, group of people, business situation, or other matter as if it were fact. I learned that in doing so he was actually asking for my opinion, which he valued highly. He wanted me to affirm his assessment, or to kindly present an alternative view if I saw things differently.
You and your spouse will each have your own unique quirks of communication, and learning those things about each other makes the journey of marriage interesting. But there are some ways in which men and women differ in general that may help you decode your spouse’s communication more quickly.