You are a theologian whether you realize it or not. Theology is nothing more than what you believe about God. And the kind of God you serve makes a tremendous difference in just about everything in your life.
God gave marriage to humankind as a good gift. But just like food, rest, pleasure, money, authority, or any other good thing, we get into serious trouble when we idolize the gift. Whether married or single, we will get wounded and disappointed if we make marriage an idol.
What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to you? Or is it happening to you right now? Or perhaps the worst is an ongoing challenge that continues to slowly drain the life out of you. Well-meaning people around you may say in various ways, “It will be OK.”
Some marriages are just plain bad. Words like sharp knives pierce tender hearts. Affection and sex are demanded, withheld, or used as bait to control and demean. God-talk is mixed with manipulation and shame. Pleas for change go unheeded. Sex and intimacy are sought outside of the marriage covenant. And the list goes on.
If you are the same person tomorrow as you are today, your life will pretty much be the same as it is now. If the only thing that changes is that you’ve been breathing for another day, another year, you’ll simply be where you now – only older. To experience a different future, you will need to become a different person.